reorganizing my room

it is a great feeling to come home to a room to mess up again. I bought some new shoes and I cant wait to get them in the mail. I've been due for some new shoes, my feet have been killing me. I have been meeting a lot of people who have back problems, people who are in pain. I fear that it would be the worst feeling in the world to be alive with constant pain. Even though, it may be bound to happen in my life. Perhaps I can prolong this from happening anytime soon. Always stay sharp, ready, patient, and humble.. In solidarity, Wesley Pacleb

10 days no smoking

10 days. Instead of writting how I feel, I will just write significant stories that occured in my life.

One night during a weekend folly. I walk into a liquor store to purchase some beer. As I wait in line, the person in front of me was talking to the cash attendant. Venting over something I really wasn't paying any attention about; but quietly, patiently awaiting my purchase. When it was my turn, I politely nodded and smirked, "How's it goin'?" The cash attendant smirked back and said "Good! Always good! You know when people say bad, and they complain? Why my life is like this, why my life is like that. My life is so bad. All these people complain and talk but don't make their lives better. It is up to the person to make their life better. That is why my life is always good." I simply nodded and understood everything this man told me. This is the reason why I don't myself down, because even if one has fallen, what matters is how fast one can get up. Always, look up and better yourself in any situation you are in. Positivity is improvment, you can always improve. The world is never perfect.

6 days no smoking

6 days it really sucks to start over. I have been using my money to learn how to cook for myself. I have been buying quinoa and mixing healthy food together. I have also been getting back to the habit of biking and exercizing

Lost things, in a clean room.
In return, forgotten memories reappear before my eyes.
overwhelmed by. thoughts, or the cling of coffee.
good times. simplicity. I am glad i have a bed.
sometimes I need to come back to you.
away from a scary reality. Outside they scream the first amendment,
but I remind myself the third.
I can't say thanks. Because we do not understand each other
polar opposites and inbetween stands
"I". and "don't" and "no"
forgetting to be written in books
or on the internet
by people who were born before I
let them live in my insipiration 
by living the moment and sharing air 
divination like love it bewares
a fire. flame. energy, in the game is not lost or transformed by definition
somewhere else it has been gained
plane jane playin along the words
freedom flying birds the prey is
inside a bigger brain
until fate recognizes balance. I can't say thanks

Relapse

I relapsed in June. I fell hard and I am going to recount the days again starting today. I feel as if I should record the good and the bad, inside my head I do not want to put myself down or make myself look bad in the public. I want to feel good about myself, I want to be healthy. Starting over again starting 7-6-2012