you win

for a long time

i couldn't realize

that love is not earned.

a long time

makes or breaks you.

and what I had to offer

was all I had left.

even at my best,

was still not enough.

and all this time

for the good and the bad

i will still hold to

the history

of what little

i could still hold on to

it made a lifetime

of happiness

even though I tried so hard

I could finally accept the fact

it was not meant to be.

Im just so sorry

that I couldn't be

the one for you

thoughts on being nice

A woman asked "Why are you so nice to me?"

Because I know how it feels to be Fucked,

maybe I know what its like out there and just a simple smile could make a difference,

or that its not in my nature to cause ill intentions, I try...

and sometimes I wish God would help me find the right person to be nice to,

because obviously its so rare these days people gotta question,



why are people so nice? is it because parents don't have time to teach their children?

Its just the way that I am. Please don't take me for granted.

And sometimes, when you're nice, you think that everyone else is that way too.

and sometimes people take my kindness for weakness,

but, Im ready.

Bring it.

text messages

I like it when someone texts me all quick.
Like in the television shows
when they have random text conversations
and the friend texts all super quick

A lot to me

"So why did you stop drawing?"

"I got really sad."

Once Upon A Time

Two years ago became
3, and three became
4, I came out of a pussy
a long time ago.
and the world fucks itself
everyday,
life is upside down.
I became everything
I never wanted to be.
2 years was a long time
ago. 5 years ago was 2012
and I thought everyone was
supposed to "see the world end."
that was the last time
I ever believed a Mayan.
I remember some good times
that will last a lifetime.
But no one cares,
so I leave them in a cage
only to starve for attention.
I look back sometimes
but they keep distancing away
like the moon from the Earth.
only can I reach so far
down the rabbit hole.

what heaven is

If only I had someone to talk to
Without pushing away
and the constant negative thoughts
someone who just looks at you
and says "fuck everyone"
then gives a simple hug

thoughts

every time i see a handprint on dust
i think of all the memories I lost
wondering why i only remember
loosing them
when i can’t remember what they were