There are have pictures of me

Trapped in a box 

Never to be looked at 

I don't know

I thought there was a bee on my neck

But it was only the tag on my vest

Caffienated bee sting only die when

They sting you. Frozen to rest I don't 

Move and I am sad. Break me into pieces at least I am free, I feel stupid and ashamed to be quiet. I don't eat and I want to stay away from everyone like my friend I havnt seen in a while. I'm not perfect, so I don't deserve anything. I just want to stay away I am not what you want.

untitled 4-5-15 sun 6:47pm

I only cry in secret like taking a shit, something so sacred beyond reasoning like taking a hit, I could feel it in my heart because I am alive I could only live once so I must thrive can you tell me again to let go of this ego I learned to become in the place that does not matter, take me to a better place If I don't belong to heaven then I worshipped the wrong God.

Paintings

Sometimes I wonder 

Where my paintings go,

Like ex lovers. If they ever

Found someplace good

Or stuck in a closet

Painted over and burned.

Forever, is what we have become

Without each other, we could never learn what we are.

Something we are and not. 

Something I cannot do is deny my soul.

Shade

I got a million things on my mind

And I where do I begin?

Tired stressed alone

But the love of those who are dear

Can give me all the reason to overcome 

My karma is not yours

Smashed cups together in a violent cheer

A laugh to not giving a fuck

Spoken to taken the wrong way

Everyday is just a little more interesting

From the tip of my tounge an idea

Not shared on facebook

Because nobody would care 

Except 10% who actually reads

Back when we were babies 

Who saw the world without words 

Are their purest form

I go back to my bed

Like I go back to you 

And nothing matters.

3-10-15 thoughts

I was put into this world to be an Artist. A painter, and yes I have hit walls that prevent me to be who I truly am. But within my goals are subgoals that will help me take me where I need to be. It is beyond money, or fame, or to be a good role model, it is to do what I was put here to do on this Earth. And like every single artist that is inside of your will, at the end of the day it will be my decision, and I have to do what I feel is best at that certain situation in time.

I never tried

I never opened my mouth

For the sake of holding a dream

And keeping it that way

Bottled up inside a perfect idea

A game without a beginning 

So that there is no play

My heart is stagnant 

My love is wretched 

I'm embarrassed 

So I hide away 

I don't 

I'm ashamed 

to love again.